I had this really amazing, "ah ha" moment today. I just got back from a weekend in St. George with the family. It was so nice and warm down there so I decided to pack clothes for warmer weather. However, all my clothes are too big right now, which is like, "boo hoo", I know, but do you realize how hard its going to be to have to continually buy new clothes every time I drop a few sizes? But it has gotten to the point were I cant "fudge" wearing a lot of the clothes I own, because they are just too big. It was really apparent down in St. George because I pulled out some clothes that I haven't worn since last season and even they were too big.
Anyway, so I had the day off today and after getting my hair done (which, by the way, I'm loving) and visiting the doctor's to find out I was 2 lbs lighter after a weekend vacation, I decided to hit the mall and find some spring/summer clothes.
So I get to my favorite store, Torrid, at the Fashion Place mall, and I start looking around. I pick out a couple of cute summer dresses and since I would normally walk in and go right for the size 4 or 5, (they do these weird sizes there to make you not feel so bad about yourself. A 5 would be a size 28 and a 4 would be a size 26.), I decided to pick up all the dresses in size 3. I got to the dressing room and started to put the first dress on. As I was putting on the dress, the sales associate came by and asked if I was doing ok. I was standing there in awe as the size 3 dress I just put on, was way too big. I said to him, "Um, I think I need a smaller size." That was the first time in 10 years I have ever said that while trying on clothes. He exchanged the dresses I grabbed for size 2s (size 22) and I put the first one on. It fit me perfectly. Right there, staring at myself in the mirror, I started to cry. I was so overcome with emotion. I was really wearing a size I haven't worn in 10 years. The sales associate came by again and asked how the 2s were working out for me and I opened the door with tears in my eyes and just stared at him. I'm sure, in that moment he thought I was crazy, but then I just blurted out to him that I never thought I would ever be a 22 again and I have lost 63 lbs and I am so excited. He just hugged me and told me way to go. I was so proud of myself in that moment. Then he was like, "I'll be right back." A few moments later he is throwing dresses over the door that he found that he thinks I will look great in. I was just laughing. He was so cute and excited for me too. He made me come out and model every dress I tried on. I even found a dress in a size 20 that fit me. It was the best shopping experience of my life. In that moment, I saw in myself, what everyone has been telling me they could see in me.
I ended up buying way too much stuff. And I know that I am just going to grow out of all of it and have to go get more stuff, but that moment felt so good, I wanted to have that motivation every time I put on clothes and looked in the mirror. I want that daily reminder that I can do this.
I snapped photos of some of the stuff I bought while I was in the dressing room. It was too good of a photo op to pass up.
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