Scale obsession and Goals I can live with

Day 32 - 316.8 lbs - That's a 38.2 lb weight loss so far.

I am finally back eating solid foods. HOORAY!! Or is it? Now that I can technically eat whatever I want, it has become exponentially harder. Someone brought donuts to work yesterday. I am not even a fan of donuts, but something about being totally off restriction has put this little voice in my head that says, 'It's ok to have 1 bite. You can eat anything now." It's been hard to not listen to that little voice in my head. There were also homemade rolls with homemade honey butter. I wanted to try it all so bad, but I just had to keep telling myself, it's not worth it. And today when I stepped on the scale and saw another good weight loss, I could look back on that decision and tell myself, "See, you made the right decision." I'm proud of myself. Now I know I can't deny myself everything all the time.  That's when you begin to resent the decision you made to follow this path, but I have to ask myself, is it worth it? I would rather save those calories for something that is really special to me. I also have to realize that there are always going to be temptations. Work is the worst for that.  There is always someone bringing treats and snack and homemade, this or that. I cant expect everyone to just stop that because its stuff I shouldn't be eating.  This is my journey and no one else's. I just have to continue to push past the desire and find a healthy alternative. And I will continue to feel better and see results.  The scale will reflect my good decisions.

Which brings me to my next thought.  I am totally obsessed with the scale. And its not a good obsession. It is always on my mind.  It has become so bad that not only do I weigh myself every day, but also multiple times a day. Because I want to see the difference between when I first get up, versus middle of the day and evening.  Also, I want to see what it says after I have eaten something, or if I've sweat a lot during an exercise routine, or whether I'm clothed or not. I also know, down to the 10% percent how my scale at home differs from the scale at work or the scale at the doctors office. I mean what I am doing is not healthy. I know that weight can vary by day too, so I have made another goal for myself:

Goal #4: I will only weight myself once a week. 

I have decided to pick Fridays because I go in for my first adjustment this Friday.  I think this will be a healthier way to do this.  I can't keep relying so much on that scale. It is making me crazy. I just need to focus day to day on all of my goals and living my life.  I can do this.

I have also hit my first weight loss goal.

Weight loss goal #1: Reach a 10% weight loss. (35 lbs)

I have been a member of Weight Watchers many times over the years and one thing that I always remember is that a 10% weight loss has serious health benefits. This article below will give you an idea of some of the things you can look forward to when reaching that monumental milestone.


http://www.weightwatchers.com/util/art/index_art.aspx?tabnum=1&art_id=41231

What Losing 10 Percent Can Do

Learn the health benefits of reaching that first milestone goal.

Article By: Sandra Gordon

Striving for your college-days weight or some other magic number on the scale can be daunting. It's much easier to reach for an incremental goal that promises sizable health benefits: Losing just 10 percent of your current body weight.

"So many projects in life are better managed by breaking them down into small chunks," says Karen Miller-Kovach, MS, RD, chief scientist at Weight Watchers International. "Weight loss is no different."

But the body you've always wanted isn't all you'll get out of accomplishing that one starter goal. Here's what else you'll gain by losing 10 percent:

A Healthier Heart
By losing just 10 percent of your body weight, you can lower your cholesterol and reduce your blood pressure, says G. Ken Goodrick, PhD, psychologist and associate professor of medicine at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston, Texas. High cholesterol and elevated blood pressure are two major risk factors for heart disease.

Lower Risk of Type 2 Diabetes
If you're overweight, you're at increased risk for type 2 diabetes, which means your body can't make enough, or properly use, insulin, a hormone that helps convert food to usable energy. By losing just 10 percent of your body weight, you'll improve your body's ability to use the insulin it makes, possibly preventing the onset of the disease, Miller-Kovach says. If you already have type 2 diabetes, shedding that 10 percent may improve your symptoms and possibly prevent complications, she adds.

More Pep
"Just a 10 percent weight loss increases feelings of vigor and vitality," says Miller-Kovach. "You'll feel better and have more energy."

A Mental Edge
Losing 10 percent can give you the self-confidence and motivation you need to keep going. "Success builds on success," says Miller-Kovach. But be sure you recognize it. "Losing 10 percent is a milestone in the journey," says Miller-Kovach. "Once you get there, take the time to congratulate yourself on your efforts."

Reality Check
After losing 10 percent, you gain a sense of what it will take to lose the rest and reach your final goal weight. "It gives you a context in terms of saying, 'Am I willing to put in that much more effort to lose even more weight?'" Miller-Kovach says. If the answer is no, that's okay. "Some people only lose 10 percent and that's it," says Goodrick. If that's you, pat yourself on the back. "Health-wise, a 10-percent weight loss is a great achievement," Goodrick says.

Thanks Weight Watchers!!

I am excited to have reached the first of many weight loss goals I have planned for myself.  Some of those goals are actual pounds, others are benefits I will get from losing those pounds. I have listed them below. I made kind of a mental list but as I am losing weight and learning more about my body, I know this list will grow.  Here is what I have for now:

Weight related goals:

Lose 10% (weight 320 lbs)
Lose 50 lbs (weight 305 lbs)
Get under 300 lbs
Lose 66 lbs (The most weight I have ever lost at one time was 65 lbs) (weight 289 lbs)
Get to 265 lbs (That's what I weighed in high school)
Lose half my total expected weight loss (lose 93 lbs - weight 262 lbs)
Lose 25% (weight 266 lbs)
Lose 100 lbs (weight 255 lbs)
Get under 200 lbs
Lose 50% (weight 178 lbs)
Reach my goal weight (weight 169 lbs)

Non weight related goals:

Shop in a normal size clothing store
Ride an airplane without having to use the seat belt extender
Hike Fannonhorn (The hill next to Camp Pinecliff where Camp Fellowship hikes every year)
Run a 5k

I know all of these goals can be attainable if I am willing to put in the effort. Wait and see....